SNP MP accused of plotting the demise of Boris Johnson

By Nobile Officium, our court reporter.


 The BBC has learned that nationalist MP Joanna Cherry QC is planning to raise a private prosecution against Prime Minster Boris Johnson.

It is understood Ms Cherry will allege that the PM is guilty of the crime of High Treason by virtue of his having unlawfully requested Her Britannic Majesty the Queen to prorogue parliament and having, consequently, lied to the crown.

Co-conspirator, Jolyon Maugham QC of the Good Law Project, told the BBC, "It is largely unknown that, under Scots law, it is possible for any citizen to request the prosecution of an individual or group of individuals for an alleged crime, up to and including the Act of Treason. While this provision was last enacted in 1827, it is still in statute.

"The outer court will decide, on the basis of evidence presented at the preliminary hearing, whether a prosecution is justified and should go ahead. If the court deems a prosecution to be justified, this will commence in the inner court within 5 days."

"A verdict of guilty could see Mr Johnson taking up residence in the Tower of London well in advance of the Brexit deadline of 31st October."

According to Ms Cherry, a successful prosecution could lead to a tricky dilemma for the Prime Minister.

"High Treason carried the penalty of death by beheading until the ECHR was incorporated into Scots law in 1998. This means, ironically, that membership of the EU may shortly be the only thing keeping the Prime Minister's head on his shoulders.", she explained.

"Consequently, if he wishes his golden mop to remain in its current exulted position, he will need to change his position on Europe from that of an alt-right nutjob leaver, to become the most ardent and vociferous remainers in the UK."

Leader of the opposition, Jeremy Corbyn, said, "Mmm. Seems a bit harsh. Perhaps a small fine would be more appropriate. With the proceeds going to promote the use of allotments. Or something. I'm just not sure.

The Prime Minister was unavailable for comment, but a Downing street source told this reporter, "One is either prorogue or antirogue, and the PM is as prorogue as they come. Just look at his cabinet."

A spokesnat for the SNP said simply, "Sic a parcel!"


In contrast to the spoof BBC across the Clyde, comments are no longer banned on BBC Scotlandshire News pages.

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