Nats furious as Tories reveal Brexit means Full English Brexit.

By Brian Kellogg, Our cereal correspondent.

Scottish seperatists have expressed their anger over revelations made this weekend that Theresa May's government is planning to order the Full English Brexit.

The nationalists were particularly chippy following a remark by proud Scot Liam Fox who, when asked by The BBC's Anne Drumar what part Scoland would play in the Brexit negotiations, said: "We will be going for the full fat English Brexit with mugs of steaming tea and not a coffee or croissant in sight. The porridge munchers will just have to eat their cereal as always".

UK ministers have confirmed that restaurants, cafes and canteens will be required to keep a list of all foreign ingredients used in their breakfasts so offenders can be named and shamed.

A list of approved British Breakfast choices will be published and the names of any outlets caught using foreign foods will be published daily in the Mail and Express, with a much longer recap on Sundays. Repeat offenders could face deportation.

Tory insiders have hinted that Scottish breakfast favourites such as clootie dumpling, tattie scone and Ayrshire bacon are seen as anti-British and will be included in the proscribed list of foreign ingredients, alongside Welsh Rarebit and the Ulster fry.

In her speech to the Conservative conference, Home Secretary Amber Rudd announced that Britons will be required to eat breakfast three times a day. However, she later denied having said this after it was pointed out that the original suggestion had been made by the Emperor Napoleon, a well-known Frenchman and suspected Europhile.

First Minister Nicola Sturgeon told the BBC: "Scots also have the right to a hearty breakfast, and that should include all European options if we wish.

"I like to start my day with a couple of brioche on square sausage smothered in brown sauce, whereas Peter prefers a charcuterie of fried haggis and Stornoway black pudding with Danish bacon.

"My government and I will fight to ensure Scots everywhere can continue to enjoy whatever breakfast they want and not be forced by Westminster Tories to 'to eat their cereal' when they really fancied porridge with a drizzle of Liege fruit compote - even if that means having another referendum on independence.

And I will support any business that refuses to send Westminster a list of it's ingredients. Theresa May and her Tories can just like it or lump it.

Leader of the Scottish Conservatives, Mooth Davidson, was unavailable for comment as she is helping police with their enquiries into a number of thefts and acts of vandalism commited at her party conference last week.


In contrast to the spoof BBC across the Clyde, comments are no longer banned on BBC Scotlandshire News pages.


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