By Scrimping Cove-Rage, Our Partially Impartial correspondent

Over the last few days BBC Scotlandshire has come under severe and unwarranted criticism for being completely biased for the absolutely wonderful campaign of the Honourable Jim Murphy MP, the leader-in-waiting of the Scotlandshire branch office of Labour and the next First Minister of Scotlandshire.

Responding to this vile CyberNatz campaign against your totally fair and balanced state propagandist and one real true broadcaster of Scotlandshire, Director General Kenny McQuarrel roared: "The number of candidates standing against our choice is two to one against oor Jim.

"If anything that makes it two against one and the one is our man.

"And one of the also-rans has the backing of the archaic unions with all their brothers and sisters nonsense.

"How can that be biased in favour of his greatness Mr Murphy?"

To try to bring a little calm to the Natz section of the Interweb, this reporter has been instructed to write an article that is totally biased towards the other contenders, so here goes.

Standing against the future leader of the Scotlandshire branch office of the Labour Party are two other also-ran contenders.

Ms Sarah Boyack, who strangely appears to be a UKIP MSP, was first to declare her intention to stand. She kicked off the whole phoney competition for us, which only goes to proves she's just too nice a person to be the leader of our political wing.

Mr Neil Findlay took the unconventional route when he became an MSP by actually having some real world experience and employment outside of politics before being elected to serve at Holyrood. He's obviously totally unsuitable to rise into high office and we cannot chance having the trade union's man winning another one of these leadership races.

The Labour Party has been in a death spiral in the polls since the trade unions interferred in the election of the annointed one back in 2010 resulting in the election of the wrong Miliband brother.

History appears to be repeating itself as Unite the Union (pure red communist) has actually dared to go up against the might of BBC Scotlandshire, and our choice of leader, by asking for member's views. The Scotlandshire brothers and sisters seem to want a local to run their affairs - the poor deluded fools actually believe they have a choice.

BBC Scotlandshire has already decided on the leader. We've told London Labour how it must be. The "specialist vote count" sub-contractors are standing by with the right result.

But back to the vile Cybernatz for our final analysis of what's wrong with the YESNP attack dogs. They're not dogs, they're hyenas who need the smile wiped from their splittist faces. The pack leader, a Ms Lena the Hyena, has been particularly vile to both the state broadcaster and our beloved partners in crime. We urge you to place this particular piece of Natz propaganda on your blocked list.

It is the dearest wish of the BBC Scotlandshire management that the CyberNatz online bile cease forthwith against oor Holyiness.

We attempted to contact the former branch manager of Labour in Scotlandshire for comment but Johann La Mont's office commented: "Sorry we don't have anyone working here by that name!"

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Unite the Union [Commies]: New poll: Working people overwhelmingly back an MSP to lead Labour in Scotland

To September And Beyond [Natz Mouthpiece]: Dial M For Murphy

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