UK vow: Vote no and you’ll get more than anyone else! And we're fine with that!

By Pullmy Legg, Our Honesty Correspondent

greatThe leaders of the 3 main UK parties have today vowed - yes vowed not pledged!- that once Scotlandshire votes ‘NoBloodyThankYou!’ on Thursday, they will introduce a suite of new powers and benefits that will make Scots the envy of the rest of the UK.

And that is fine because, though this has not yet been put to the London Parliament that has yet to be elected next year, everyone in the rest of the UK is just fine with that!

The English are fine with it because they think the Scots are just great and deserve all the extra powers they could possibly want.

The Northern Irish think it is just great because they 100% favour home rule in a big way!

But nowhere is this all more popular than in Waleshire, where the Labour administration is tickled pink to be already cutting its health spending as part of austerity measures in order to see Scotlandshire getting a bigger slice per head of the funding cake than they do.

All across these islands, the clamour is the same- give the Scots more powers and more funding if they vote no - absolutely yes - they are great and deserve more funding, a better health service and better education than we do! This is obvious- we love Scotland- go for it London- give them everything they deserve!

And indeed, if some naysayers round the edges have their way, Scotlandshire getting ‘everything she deserves’ is exactly what they would like to see happen. These nasty individuals claim that, in the event of a no vote, the electorate in the rest of the UK will not stand for Scotland being given a better deal than them - but these are simply crazed voices in the wilderness.

They claim the Barnett formula would be scrapped, austerity measures contained within Acts already passed would come into force in Scotlandshire and that the general roll-back of the State favoured by both Tory and Labour would happen here too! Preposterous!

catalan chainAs crazed in fact as the lunatics supporting a yes vote! As crazed as the hundreds of Welsh who gathered in support of independence at a rally at the weekend, and certainly as mad as the 1.9 million Catalans who marched in support of Scottish independence last week.

No wonder the Spanish foreign minister points out the insurmountable problems of independence - there are millions of Catalans who would only be encouraged in the same foolish endeavour if Scotlandshire voted yes!

Thankfully, no stage is offered to these lunatics supporting yes by our fine upstanding media who are very clear that the rest of the UK stands four square behind the pledge - vote no, and the rest of the UK will stay poor so Scotlandshire can be comfortable!

Hurrah and thanks to our friends and family down South for doing this for us - we think they’re Grrrrreat!


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