The Naw Regional Anthem

By Commie Poser, Our drugged up club music correspondent

Weed of ScotlandshireBetter Together has today proposed a new regional anthem for Scotlandshire that will be introduced after the vile Natz are crushed in the forthcoming splittist referendum.

The new anthem has been composed and written by Lord Barrowman of Naetalent, the world famous entertainment legend and NO supporter.

Renowned colourist Jilly Blackwood has acclaimed the anthem as the finest colourful tune ever written.

The catchy anthem will certainly sum up the mood of Scotlandshire and will be aired on the few occasions when "Jerusalem" and "God Save the Queen" may not be appropriate.

O weed of Scotlandshire
When will we see, an indy ref again
You bottled and voted for
Rule awe Westminster an' Big Ben
And stood against Eck
Proud David’s Tories
And sent him Londonward
Tae rule again

The oil is gone now
And nukes replaced, just for the thrill
Instead you've got foodbanks
And beans so dearly sold
And stood against Eck
Proud David’s Tories
And sent him Londonward
Tae rule again

Those Jocks amass now
And in the crowd, they wish again
But only a naw vote
Saw English rule retained
And stood against Eck
Proud David’s Tories
And sent him Londonward
Tae rule again

New watchdog: Chas n DaveBlair McDonut, heidbanger of Better Together, responded: "It will certainly be a welcome rest from that terrible dirge the Natz love to sing at the moment.

"The devolved powers coming to Scotlandshire, after a NO vote, will include a complete ban on anything and everything that doesn't sound like a Cockney knees up song.

"Our new Scotlandshire Office Commissioners, Chas and Dave, will ensure complete and utter compliance with these new devolved powers."

The Scotlandshire Commonwealth Team nearly brought shame to their region by singing a soon to be proscribed song in the tunnel during the opening ceremony.

One of the rebel atheletes was overheard to say: "I'll wear this uniform. I'll even listen to Matheson without booing. But there's no way they'll stop me singing my national anthem!"

The athelete, who's obviously high on some banned substance, is currently undergoing drugs testing.


Surveillance Video

A small number of separatist rebels were recorded by an undercover BBC Scotlandshire reporter singing about the fabled land of "Scotland".


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