By Unpaid Intern, Our Holding the Fort With No Resources Idiot

With T in the Park happening - perhaps for the last time! - it's worth reprinting this scare story timely warning from May this year.

The SNP must explain how T in the Park will operate after separation, say Unionists.

Conservative MSP Nanette Milne wrote to the music festival’s sponsor Tennents asking if it had been approached by ministers and was told that the future of the event is not a matter for them, but for the promoter to decide.

Ms Milne declined to write to promoter DF Concerts and decided she had heard enough, clyping to U-KOK head Alistair Darling.

“Look, this is all very uncertain once again from the Nats,” said Darling.

“Real Scots across the region want to know if they can still listen to the noises of today while drunk in a field, covered in mud and smelling of urine. People need these assurances.

“In a separate Scotlandshire, British music will no longer be our music. It will be someone else’s to celebrate. Do you want to see T in the Park consisting of Andy Stewart, Michelle McManus and not a whole lot else?

“No, I didn’t think so. We’re Better Together.”

A spokeswoman for DF Concerts told BBC Scotlandshire: “T in the Park will be around longer than the No campaign, Mr Darling. How’s that for detail, you cock head.”

Important and Confidential Memo

From Head of Fear and Propaganda, London

To Head of Fear and Propagands (for the moment!), Glasgow

What the hell do you mean by publishing that photo?

It was being kept for the anti-Union campaign in 2016, to show how England would be reduced to penury if we stick in a union with these foreigners across the Channel.

Here's the kind of thing you should have been using -

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